College (2008) - Unrated

Genre(s): Comedy --> Sex
MGM || Unrated - 95 minutes - $29.99 || January 27, 2009
Reviewer: Brian Oliver || Posted On: 2009-01-19


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.:: F I L M ::.
The Film

S P E C I A L
.: F E A T U R E S :.

Special Features

.:: V I D E O ::.
Video

.:: A U D I O ::.
Audio

.:: O V E R A L L ::.
Overall
.::MOVIE INFORMATION::.
Director: Deb Hagan
Writer(s): Dan Callahan & Adam Ellison (written by)
Cast: Drake Bell, Andrew Caldwell, Kevin Covais, Camille Mana, Nick Zano, Gary Owen


Theatrical Release Date: August 29, 2008


.::DVD INFORMATION::.
Supplemental Material:
  • Theatrical and Unrated Versions
  • Gag Reel


Technical Information:
  • Number of Discs: 1
  • Widescreen (1.85)
  • English (Dolby Digital 5.1)
  • Subtitles: English

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.::THE FILM::.

IMAGE

This isnít going to be a long, tedious review. In fact, I can sum up College in only a few words: It is a blatant rip-off of Superbad (not to mention every other teen sex comedy). You know those B-movie rip-offs Asylum Home Entertainment releases like I Am Omega, Snakes on a Train, The Da Vinci Treasure, Street Racer, The Day the Earth Stopped, etc? Yeah, itís almost along those lines of rip-offs.

The story is about three high school friends: an un-cool, though otherwise kind of normal guy (Drake Bell; Superhero Movie), the fat obnoxious and raunchy friend (Andrew Caldwell; Drillbit Taylor) and a socially awkward but very smart geek (Kevin Covais; Chicken Little of ďAmerican IdolĒ fame). Together they take a trip to a college where the parties are wild, alcohol is plentiful and the women are hot and naked! Woo hoo! You see, the Un-cool But Otherwise Normal Guy just got dumped by his high school sweetheart and he now wants to live it up, especially with the encouragement of the Fat Obnoxious and Raunchy Friend, though of course Chicken Little was hesitant as he is counting on a scholarship.

Rather than staying in the dorms with a creepy masturbator, the trio decides to stay with a frat house full of a-holes. Make matters worse, the Un-cool But Otherwise Normal Guy falls for one of the frat brothers trophy bangs and they decide to make the weekend a living hell for these high school-ers. Chaos and hilarity ensues, and the three buds discover a lesson about... well, Iím still not quite sure.

College in a nutshell is one of the worst comedies Iíve seen in quite a while; itís only competition for the bottom spot is the somehow far worse The Love Guru. At least College has the excuse of having zero comedic talents in its cast, I still cannot find one for the Mike Myersí flop.

I guess my biggest gripe isnít so much that it wasnít funny, although I did manage to chuckle a time or two, nor is it the amount of gratuitous nudity (whatís to complain about that? Hell, it worked in all those 1980s teen sex comedies like Porkyís) but itís the fact writers Dan Callahan and Adam Ellison (debut for both) could not come up with one original moment that wasnít already on film before. I understand that with this kind of comedy, material is limited, but to blatantly rip-off other films, especially the three main characters is just inexcusable.

And then there is the ridiculous portrayal of the college life. Yes, there are parties, drinking and love making in college, of course there is, but College takes it to the unbelievable extreme. Even for a teen sex ďcomedyĒ, I found it hard to believe any one of these guys would even catch the interest of the hot chicks so quickly. I know, this is just a movie and plenty other films do the same thing, but I guess if this ďcomedyĒ were actually hilarious (see: Animal House), I could overlook such details. Alas, since the jokes and situations fell flat, what else was I to focus on when there was no female nudity (I say female because male buttock crack shots were aplenty).

If you want to see a good teen sex comedy, there are plenty other options out there like American Pie, Animal House and, of course, Superbad.



.::SPECIAL FEATURES::.

Apparently MGM knew what they had on their hands as the only extra on this stinker is a standard gag reel (5:16) along with the theatrical and unrated versions of the film (less than a minute difference, just enough to get the ďUnratedĒ rating).



.::AUDIO & VIDEO::.

IMAGE

As usual, MGM has provided a watermarked copy so I canít speak to the true quality (of the picture, not the movie...), but it is presented in its OAR of 1.85 and seemed quite soft in many places, not that it matters.

I also canít speak to the audio, but the DVD comes with a regular Dolby Digital 5.1 track so you can hear every dooky drop or urine stream come through your surround system. Yay!



.::OVERALL::.

Not going to go on and on only to say: skip this. The end.